When Change Is Upon You

As we move through Virgo season, it’s always one where action starts to kick into high gear and all the internal shifts and prep behind the scenes start to come into outward form. Since leaving teaching 3 years ago, September has taken on a whole new meaning for me. It’s been an incredibly beautiful time of being present, enjoying and taking action. I’ve come to really love this month of the year.

However, the new action that September brings also presents big change.

Change is something I don’t always do well with, as I’m sure many other humans can relate to, because the fact of the matter is that we like what is familiar and what is comfortable. We want to know for certain. We crave knowing.

This September, I am in the midst of acting on some big knowings that I’ve had percolating for some time. It’s now time to step into them. The body (and mind) can really start to feel shaky when this period sets in. Am I really doing this? What if xyz? Why am I leaving this comfy and easy place?

Personally, the answer is almost always that I want change, and staying in my “comfortable familiar” past its due date will actually feel worse than stepping outside my comfort zone.

On the other side is my growth zone, where my new goals, dreams and desires exist.

This fall, some of my transitions will involve: going to a new country, going back to a soul-place, being more seen in my business, and stepping into self-promotion - as well as embracing change that is still unfolding, mainly things that have lived outside of the comfort zone I’ve built over the last 3 years. Largely though, I’ll be exiting the chapter I have been in since 2021.

Deeper Security

An important realization I’ll be continuing to let sink in is that the comfort, safety and security I’ve built over this period is actually within myself, and it’s here to stay. It will come with me wherever I go next and as I grow. And it’s time to break the mold and travel outside the perimeter of the external comfort zone, deeper into both the unknown and the beautiful.

And while the shakiness and the fear can creep in, the other side of the same coin in this experience is excitement and joy. When we move into what our heart is calling for next, it is so liberating and fulfilling.

If you’re in a season of growth, I want that for you too.

Practices To Support Change

Here are some practices I’ve found most helpful as I navigate my season of change this month leading into fall.

Regulate Your Body

Turns out that when we are being called into big changes that invite the unfamiliar, our system starts to sniff it out. Our nervous system’s job is to keep us safe and to scan for any potential dangers or threats. It also likes what is familiar because it is predictable and known.

Remind yourself of the difference between your system and your authentic self. My system feels that familiar is safety. My authentic self feels that new challenges are what’s best.

This is where nervous system regulation comes in as an important tool in the process. When we can deep breathe, soften the body, rock or sway, go into nature, take a bath - anything that we find soothing and regulating to us, we are letting the body shift back into parasympathetic rest and digest. These practices let our body know we are safe through its own language, instead of us speaking to the body in our verbal language which doesn’t always integrate.

Connect to Your Knowing

The reframe that I’ve offered myself over the years has been shifting from needing to know the external to connect to my knowing within. This is where the true magic, potential and resourcing happens. And, it turns out to be way more meaningful than any external form of certainty we think we have.

Instead of needing to know how something will unfold outside of you, can you shift the focus on what is true within you. What do I know to be true? How can I shift my attention from what’s outside of me to what I know within me? What does my heart say? What is true?

Comforts List

When you’re going through a big change, and there’s a lot of big pieces that may be unfamiliar, it can be deeply helpful to resource into small comforts that are familiar to you. This might be a favourite water bottle, a family photo, a poetry book, music that makes you smile, or an activity you love.

I like to ensure I have non-tangible items on my list too, so that if I were to loose a water bottle or forget my photo, I would still be able to tap into that familiar comfort. Another way to do this is to connect to the feeling that these things bring you and return back to that somatic experience when you need it. I might recall the feeling of hugging my parent’s dog or lying in the sun at the beach. This somatic resourcing is powerful. We can even titrate between big new pieces and familiar comforts as we move into change.

Remind Yourself You’re Not Alone

At times when we are moving through growing pains, it can feel like we’re the only one experiencing this. However, this is far from the truth. And as the core concept of common humanity in self-compassion tells us, we are never alone in the things we experience as humans. We are far from alone in our experiences of challenge, change, difficulty, pain or hardship, or equally joy and passion.

The real question here is, how can I connect to others around me to share in our experiences to source a sense of community and connection? This might be calling a close friend to share how we’re feeling, arranging a meet-up group on a shared topic or interest, going to a class. This often starts with us sharing vulnerably to create the invitation for someone else to go next. And it can feel incredibly connective and powerful when someone shares back in one form or another, “me too”.

Trust

This word gets thrown around a lot. What I mean here is trusting that you don’t need to see the whole blueprint right now to know that you will be alright - that you will be more than alright, and that everything is coming in due time.

Continue to follow your inner compass, continue to connect with others, regulate, hold space for your dreams, and have the courage to leap and trust that it will all work out.

This gets to be an unfolding that is remarkable and powerful.

Here’s to it x,

Jessie